Wish You Were Here
by clagjanet
Summary: A tiny moment on Lee and Amanda's wedding day. Today of all days, it just felt like one lie too many.


_In "Mission of Gold", we hear Lee lie to Billy about flying out as soon as he heard what happened. Yet when he called Dotty earlier, it seemed like he knew she knew he was there already. Just common sense? Or had something else happened we didn't see?_

_All the usual disclaimers apply._

* * *

Amanda applied her lipstick carefully, then stood back to examine herself in the mirror one last time. She tugged at her silk jacket self-consciously and shifted from side to side checking that everything looked perfect. She ran her hand over her hair again, relieved that she'd managed to brush out most of the hairspray she'd applied to play Dixie, but checking for any stray strands of hay that might still be lurking from their showdown with Felicia.

Nothing could be out of place today of all days. Even if it was only Lee that was going to see her, a bride still wants to look perfect. She could almost hear her mother's voice telling her that, the way she had on her wedding day to Joe.

Thinking of her mother brought the tiniest frown to her face and she sighed. She loved Lee with her whole heart and she knew this secret marriage was for the best but… it seemed wrong that her mother wasn't here to see it.

_I wonder if he'll catch something._

That brought a small smile to her face. Lee had laughed out loud when she'd repeated it to him.

_Oh I think you're pretty firmly hooked_, he'd teased, pulling her in for a kiss.

Her mother may not have believed her story about heading to California on her own, but she definitely wouldn't believe that her only daughter was currently in a courthouse bathroom preparing to marry Lee Stetson with only strangers to witness it. Of all the lies she'd told her mother over the last few years, this one was the biggest of all. So many lies, some little, some big, always for a good reason it seemed but sometimes it seemed like she lied about things she didn't need to anymore, just from habit…

Still staring into the mirror, her eyes strayed to the phone on the wall behind her, then to the clock above it.

_The judge's assistant said he was running late..._ _I could just take two extra minutes, couldn't I?_

Without allowing herself another moment for hesitation, she turned and moved quickly across the room, picking up the receiver and dialing the familiar home number.

"Hello?" Her mother picked up on the first ring. Amanda could hear the sounds of the boys laughing and squabbling in the background as they helped their grandmother prepare dinner. The pang of them not being here today struck again.

"Hi Mother, it's me."

"Amanda? I thought you'd left already. Was your flight delayed?"

"No, I've just got a few minutes before I have to go…"

"Did you forget something? Is that why you called?"

"No, Mother, I just wanted to tell you I'm - " she paused and took a deep breath. Maybe this was a bad idea – she and Lee had agreed after all…

"You're what, Darling?"

"I'm going away with Lee," Amanda blurted out. "On this vacation. You were right all along and I don't know why I felt like I couldn't tell you, but we're going to California together and I just suddenly realized how silly it was that I was sneaking around the way I did when I was a teenager and I wanted to call and tell you that you were right and that I love you."

Her mother had begun laughing halfway through the ramble. "Well, of course you're going with Lee, Darling. Did you really think I ever doubted that?"

"And you're not upset that I pretended I wasn't?"

"Of course I'm not, Amanda. Everyone should have a little spice in their life sometimes – a little romance and adventure, maybe a little intrigue – and you certainly don't get that normally do you? Not working for a documentary film company." Dotty's voice dropped, so that the boys couldn't hear her. "Although, I'm sure that editing room you're so fond of has seen more than its fair share of scandal," she teased.

"Oh Mother," sighed Amanda laughing.

"You go and have a marvelous, romantic time, Darling – he really is the most wonderful man and I'm so glad you found each other."

"You really do like him, don't you, Mother? I mean, I know I think he's wonderful but you and the boys…"

"Oh Amanda, you know I do – and the boys like him just fine. How could we not like someone who looks at you the way Lee does and makes you so happy? That man adores you, Amanda, and the only way you could upset me is if you let him get away."

There was a light knock on the bathroom door and Lee's voice, muffled "Come on, Amanda – he's going to go home!"

"Mother, they're calling us, I have to go. I love you. Tell the boys I love them too."

"Have a wonderful time, Darling. Maybe if you and Lee can tear yourself away from whatever it is you have planned-" Amanda could hear the cheerful innuendo dripping from her mother's voice – "Maybe you could drop us a postcard. You know, just a few words so we know you're alive, like "Wish you were here" or something." Dotty's laugh rolled down the phone line at her own joke.

"I'll try, Mother. I-I-I have to go – I'll call you when we get there, okay?"

"Good bye Darling, I love you!" Amanda could hear the boys chiming in the same in the background.

"I love you too," she choked out before hanging up. She gave the mirror one final glance, dabbed her eyes gently and took a deep breath.

"Oh Mother… I really do wish you were here."


End file.
